I’m standing in for Justin again, as he continues to labor for his creative writing professor. He got a 100% on his first writing assignment!
Still going with the creative writing theme, I thought we should start a (regular?) Fantasy Limericks contest. Your job is to write an original fantasy-themed limerick. It could be kind of general, such as this one about a dragon which was written by Val Burns for The Omnificent English Dictionary In Limerick Form (OEDILF):
George cried, “I’ll fight the dragon, oh sire,
Though the reptile is huge and breathes fire.
Thus the princess I’ll save
From a grave in the cave.
Though she’s hot, that much heat would prove dire.”
Or your limerick could be about a particular fantasy novel, character, or event. Whatever you want, as long as it’s related to fantasy literature.
A proper limerick follows strict rules about rhyme, meter, and content, so please consult the OEDILF’s tutorial to make sure yours complies. A limerick should be funny or witty or otherwise charming.
Post your limerick as a comment below. Tim, one of our literature experts, will pick a U.S. winner who will choose a book from our stacks. If you’re outside the U.S., we hope you’ll play, too. Good luck, limerickers!
OK, no limericks?? Is anybody working on one? Am I the only one who thinks limericks are fun??
There was a young woman from Krynn,
whose waist was incredibly thin.
She hitched up her wagon, to capture a dragon
and cook him up nice for her din.
Brilliant!! Excellent limerick, Stefan!
Thanks! Hopefully that’ll get the ball rolling. If not, maybe I can come up with another.
Takshi Kovacs is back
With his shiny new cortical stack
He’s looking quite fine
By genetic design
‘Cause he won’t buy his bods off the rack.
And a draft of a limerick:
China Mieville chose the name Kraken
Because “Octopussy” was taken
His fans paid him in thrones
Built of bottles and bones
And all of the krill he could take in.
Joe Abercrombie is swell
His characters go through Hell
They’re tortured and maimed
Left never the same
But boy what stories they tell!
George R. Martin was writing a book
at the size of the book did he look
He said, “What shall I do?”
Now this book’s become two!
And my readers now will call me a crook!”
And another one:
It’s a story that’s become ancient lore
It’s a tome that could stop up a door
It’s a quest for an heir
but let the reader beware
For one cannot simply walk into Mordor
I’m fixing my first limerick. Here’s the new and improved version:
George R. Martin did not know what to do
as he watched his worst nightmares come true
the fourth book of the “Song”
was so unimaginably long
that he had no choice but to cut it in two.
FitzChivalry Farseer’s kin
are ruling the land he lives in.
But he’s illegit
(plus, he’s got the Wit),
So the throne Fitz never will win.
Young Kvothe was a most clever lad.
And of lute players best to be had.
But to him all this stuff
Just wasn’t enough.
He became a promiscuous cad.
Sir Read-a-Lot, if you live in the USA, you win a book of your choice from our stacks. Please contact me (Tim) with your choice and a US address.